


I’ll Never Love Again

by LittleOneFanfiction



Category: Once Upon a Time (TV)
Genre: F/F, angst but with a happy ending, swanqueen - Freeform
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2018-10-09
Updated: 2018-10-09
Packaged: 2019-07-28 18:34:23
Rating: Teen And Up Audiences
Warnings: Creator Chose Not To Use Archive Warnings
Chapters: 1
Words: 1,118
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/16247432
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/LittleOneFanfiction/pseuds/LittleOneFanfiction
Summary: Emma Swan just married.Regina Mills is devastated. And with so many feeling inside of her.A letter is written.Is she able to love again?We will find out.





	I’ll Never Love Again

**Author's Note:**

> This one shot was inspired by the song “I’ll never love again”, from the movie “A Star is Born.”
> 
> I hope y’all can love reading the story as much as I loved writing it.
> 
> (English is not my first language, so my apologies if there’s any typo.)

It happened.

It **really** happened.

 

Back at home, in the darkness of my living room, I’m sitting on the couch.

Serving myself with my finest whisky.

Yes, I’m a apple cider kind of person, but today I need something stronger.

Looking at the window I still can hear the music coming from the wedding reception.

 

Her wedding reception.

Her wedding.

Her **damn** wedding.

 

When my sister took her hand and I saw that ring I didn’t want to believe.

We were never really close.

But we were trying.

I was changing.

( **She** changed me).

For good.

( **She** changed me for good.)

But when we hugged each other I felt like I was losing her, what seems stupid, because I never really had her.

 

When I received the invitation for her wedding my heart told me not to go.

But love is weakness, as my mom always told me.

And my heart was loving.

 **I was loving**.

I can’t say with certain since when.

It doesn’t matter now, anyways.

So I did go.

I stood there, with our son, by my side, taking my hand.

She was beautiful. She was always beautiful, but today she was even more beautiful.

For a moment she looked at me.

I wished I could be strong enough to end up with all of this.

But I was not selfish.

At least, not anymore.

Love is wanting to see the person we love happy and if her happiness is not with me I had to accept it.

But this was **too much**.

That’s why when she invited me to be in the wedding reception I said no.

I couldn’t.

I couldn’t torture my heart even more.

I saw sadness in her eyes.

So I said _“Go enjoy the rest of your day, Miss Swan.”_

And then I left. Without looking back.

Because I couldn’t bare her looking at me. Like that.

 

And here I am.

Alone in my house while the rest of them are enjoying themselves on the most important day of the love of my life.

**The love of my life.**

God, how did I end up like this?

I got up off the couch, going to the office.

I took a pen and paper and I started writing.

 

_Emma,_

 

_I’m sorry._

_I was weak._

 

_Wish I could have said goodbye._

(Or not having to say. At all.)

_I would have said what I wanted to_

_Maybe even cried for you._

(But it wouldn’t be fair. It just took me so long to understand. And now it’s too late.)

 

_If I knew it would be the last time_

_I would have broke my heart in two_

(Like I did for your parents. The truest love I’ve ever known in my life.)

_Tryin’ to save a part of you_

(Like you for me. So many times.)

 

_Don’t want to feel another touch_

(I would give my life for another hug from you.)

_Don’t want to start another fire_

(Because our magic is stronger enough. Together.)

_Don’t want to know another kiss_

(Even though we’ve never kissed.)

_No other name falling off my lips_

(Because yours is my favorite.)

_Don’t want to give my heart away_

_To another stranger_

_Or let another day beign_

_Won’t even let the sunlight in_

(Because without you next to me, there’s no sun in my life.)

_No I’ll never love again_

 

Tears fall from my face.

I have to open my heart and write this all.

Even if it is one of the most hard things I’ve ever did in my life.

Apart from losing her.

This was and still is the hardest.

 

_When we first met_

_I never thought that I would fall_

(Until the moment when I asked “You’re Henry’s birth mother?” and you gave me the most beautiful smile I’ve ever seen, following with a shy “Hi.”)

_I never thought that I’d find myself lyin’ in your arms_

(In my dreams you never left my side. Every single night.)

_And I wanna pretend that it’s not true_

_Oh baby that you’re gone_

(But it is, unfortunately.)

_Cause my world keeps turnin’ and turnin’ and turnin’_

_and I’m not moving on_

(And I don’t know if I want to.)

 

_Don’t want to feel another touch_

(I want to feel yours for the rest of my life.)

_Don’t want to start another fire_

(Please let’s keep doing magic. Together.)

_Don’t want to know another kiss_

(I could lose myself in your lips.)

_No other name falling off my lips_

( **Emma Swan.** )

 

_Don’t want to give my heart away_

_To another stranger_

_Or let another day begin_

_Won’t even let the sunlight in_

(You are the sun in my darkness.)

_No I’ll never love again_

 

_I don’t wanna know this feeling unless it’s_

_you and me_

(Like it always should be. Now I can see it. Clearly.)

_I don’t wanna waste a moment_

(But it feels like I wasted a lifetime.)

_And I don’t wanna give somebody else the better part of me_

( **You.** )

_I would rather wait for you_

(Tell me...is it worth it?)

 

_Don’t want to feel another touch_

_Don’t want to start another fire_

_Don’t want to know another kiss_

_Baby unless they are your lips_

(And God, how I want taste your lips.)

 

_Don’t want to give my heart away_

_to another stranger_

(Because my heart will always be yours.)

_Or let another day begin_

_Won’t even let the sunlight in_

 

_Oh, I’ll never love again_

(Let me love you.)

_Love again_

_I’ll never love again_

(Let me love you as you deserve to be loved.)

_I’ll never love_

_Again_

 

_I won't I won't I swear I can't_

_I wish I could but I just won't_

_I'll never love again_

_I'll never love_

_Again_

 

_Yours,_

_Regina_

 

P.S: I know you will never read my letter, but my love for you will always remain written not in the stars but by the hands of someone who loved you more than the stars shine in the sky.

 

I dropped the pen and folded the letter, placing it inside an envelope, then storing it in the bottom of a drawer.

I took a deep breath. The party was still happening outside.

 

The bell rang.

I was not expecting anyone.

By now the whole town would be at the party.

Who could it be?

I opened the door.

And here she was. Beautiful as always.

 

_“You weren’t there. And then I realized: I need you. Only you. It was always you.”_

 

She smiles to me. The very same smile she gave me the night we met.

(Now I know when I feel for her)

I smile back to her.

 

Maybe I’ll love again.

(And be loved.)

**Author's Note:**

> All the comments are very welcome. Thank you :)


End file.
